Pom Gets Wi-Fi


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Pom Gets Wi-Fi

DoraMe Patra's surreal indie adventure game Pom Gets Wi-Fi is one of those games that makes you pause every so often and give your face a light slap to make sure you aren't hallucinating, and also makes you sound like a complete lunatic and a liar when describing it to other people. You play as a self-absorbed, foul-mouthed, pop-culture obsessed Pomeranian pup who wants nothing more than to spend all day (every day) on the internet, which might hit a bit too close to home for some of us. Things get, uh, complicated, however, and suddenly she finds herself stuck somewhere with no internet connection, and thus begins a quest to get hooked back up online.

Pom Gets Wi-FiUse [WASD] to walk around, and [Z] to interact with things or dogs. To find Pom's beloved internets, you'll need to explore, examining everything and chatting with every dog you find. You can save your game by chatting with Dave Pointer, the swanky looking dog standing below the roses. Shibe, Pom's long-suffering yet bafflingly loyal Shiba Inu housemate, will tag along, and you can talk to him whenever you like to get hints as to what you're doing, or simply to deliver some more verbal abuse. Pom, you see, is... uh... acerbic in that special "I spend 99% of my waking time online" sort of way, which means she delivers a steady flood of profanity, insults, crudity, and pop-culture references to everyone and everything she meets. For some players, this can make her both unbearable and at times impossible to understand, and the unrelenting, cheery nonsense won't be to everyone's tastes... nor will the amount of back-and-forth running you'll have to do to complete fetch-quests.

But while Pom Gets Wi-Fi may be weird, silly, and immature, well, if that's your sense of humour, those are marks in its favour. The cheery artwork and sheer ridiculousness of everything means it's hard not to play with a smile on your face, and the baffled reactions of the other dogs, who also can rarely understand what Pom is talking about, never fail to amuse. It's not what you would call a hard game, though to get the second ending you might have to go against your basic gamer instincts a bit, and the few turn-based battle sequences likely won't give you any trouble since they're mostly for show. Pom Gets Wi-Fi is a crazy, over-the-top parody of both adventure games and online life in general, and it's even unexpectedly sweet at times... in its own bizarre way. It won't take long, but while it lasts, Pom Gets Wi-Fi makes an impression... just remember to get out n smell da rozes sumtimes, senpai, kk? <3

WindowsWindows:
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Mac OS XMac OS X:
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Try Boot Camp or Parallels or CrossOver Games.

Walkthrough Guide


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Pom Gets Wi-Fi Walkthrough

General Information

  • To begin playing, first open the "Pom Gets Wi-Fi" file (make sure you have the most recent version, currently v1-03). Double-click the RPG_RT application - the one with the sword icon - to start the game.

  • To switch between Fullscreen or Windowed mode, press the [F4] key or simultaneously push [Alt] + [Enter].

  • Move your character around the screen using the [W,A,S,D] or [arrow] keys.

    • When Shibe is in your party, he will automatically follow behind you. You cannot move through him or through other dogs.

  • Press [Z] or [spacebar] to interact with objects or characters and to skip through text or confirm dialogue options.

    • If you interact with Shibe, he sometimes offers you a hint about your current objective.

  • While in battle, use the Up or Down [arrow] keys to select an attack, then press [Z] or [spacebar] to confirm.

    • Your "Taunt" ability is the strongest the first time you attack with it and becomes gradually weaker with each use. Activate it twice or three times at most at the start of the battle, then switch to your other attack.

    • Finish off your enemy with "Tell a yo momma joke" which is a steady attack that always deals 10 damage to the enemy.

  • Be sure to save often! Talk to Dave Pointer, select a Save File slot (there are a maximum of 15 slots), then press [spacebar] or [Z] to save.

    • Saving over an occupied Save File slot will overwrite the previous save.

Pom's Home

  1. Press the [Z] key or [spacebar] to view any three of the four websites: Facewoof, Reddig, gTail, and Tumfur.

  2. Once you're permanently done surfing the internet, you will be automatically transported to the next area.

Find Someone Who Knows About Wi-Fi

  1. Walk right to find Shibe. After your conversation, the battle will begin automatically.

    • Attack Shibe with the "Taunt" and "Tell a yo momma joke" abilities. He won't return fire, so you can just keep attacking him until he's out of health.

    • When the battle is over Shibe will join your party.

  2. Continue right until you reach the cloud with two houses on it. Enter the lower purple house through the front door.

  3. Go up the stairs and talk to York.

    • York will tell you that the cafe to the east has Wi-Fi.

    • If you talk to him a second time, he'll also mention that Grandpa once bought him a Root Beer Float.

  4. Exit the building and go across the rainbow bridge to the right.

    • On this cloud you'll find Dave Pointer. You can talk to him at any time to save your game.

  5. Move right to reach the Park. A line of dogs is blocking your path!

Sneak into the Park

  1. Go to the line of dogs in front of the Park entrance. Looks like Sherman won't let you pass!

  2. Talk to Labra or Alma to receive a STACK OF BOOKS.

  3. Walk to the middle of the fence, then examine the stone block.

    • If you've spoken with every dog in line, you can place the STACK OF BOOKS on top of the block to make it taller.

    • It's still not tall enough though, you'll have to find more things to put on the rock.

  4. Talk to Goldie at the front of the line to ask for something to borrow.

    • Goldie will request that you fetch her some dog treats from Papi.

  5. Move left across two rainbow bridges to return to the two houses. Enter the pink house at the top.

    • As soon as you go through the door, Crest will beg you to save her from the spider.

    • Walk to the moving black speck and interact with it to smush the spider. Puddle will then enter the room and reward you with an INFLATABLE DOLPHIN.

  6. Go back outside and walk across the rainbow bridge to the left.

  7. Speak with Papi to ask for Goldie's dog treats.

    • She doesn't have the treats, but you will receive a FAMICOM.

  8. Go all the way right to return to the Park.

    • You now have to make a choice between two options:

      • (Bad) Keep the FAMICOM for yourself and place it on top of the stone block (along with the INFLATABLE DOLPHIN) or...

      • (Good) Return the FAMICOM to Goldie, the golden retriever at the front of the line.

        • If you choose the "Good" option, Goldie will reward you by allowing you to keep the FAMICOM, which you can then stack on top of the stone block.

  9. Interact with the stack of objects on top of the block to enter the park.

Fix the Frisbee Machine

  1. Run past the dangerous line of frisbees to make it to the end of the park safely.

    • The frisbees pause momentarily when they reach the right wall, you can watch them on that side to learn the pattern of their movement.

    • Move along the left wall to give yourself as much time as possible to dodge the frisbees.

  2. Hus will approach you when you reach the end of the park. After a brief converastion, he'll join your party.

  3. Enter the small hole by the upper left corner of the fence to go inside the frisbee machine room

  4. Interact with the ball of dust blocking the right path to remove it.

  5. Continue right to examine the wall of hardened dust.

    • It's too tight for Pom to get through! You'll have to find someone else who can reach the control panel.

  6. Walk left and go down through the gap in the wall to go back outside.

  7. Make your way back to the front of the park, you'll have to dodge the frisbees again.

    • You can use Hus to block the frisbees by positioning yourself to his left.

    • Alternatively, if you're feeling lazy you can get hit by a frisbee and you'll be autoamtically returned to the bottom of the park again.

  8. Exit through the front gate and walk to the dog at the end of the line.

    • Talk to Chi to ask him to join your party.

  9. Re-enter the park and make it past the flying frisbees one more time.

  10. Once you've made it to the back safely, interact with the entrance to the frisbee machine room to send Chi inside.

    • Chi will repair the frisbee machine, allowing you to safely return to the park entrance.

  11. Now that the line is gone, you can cross the right bridge to reach the Cafe!

Get Access to the Cafe - Paying customers only!

  1. Cross the rainbow bridge to reach the Starpugs Coffee cloud. Enter the cafe through the door at the right side of the building.

  2. Talk to Ug at the counter to ask for access to the cafe's wi-fi.

    • Pug will demand you buy something using dog treats... but you're broke! Go out the door to return outside.

  3. A new dog has appeared in front of the cafe. Interact with Bernard to speak to him.

    • Bernard will give you a CAMERA and ask you to stealthily take pictures of Crest (creepy!)

  4. Walk left until you reach the two houses to find Crest. Follow her as she hands out cookies to the dogs around heaven.

  5. Crest will make three stops: the first is at Papi, the second is at Dave Pointer, and the third is in front of the dog park.

    • At each stop you'll be given another moral choice, "Take some pictures?"

      • (Bad) "Yes."

        • If you choose this option even once out of the three times, you will receive the "Bad" result. Go to Bernard to deliver the photos in exchange for some DOG TREATS.

      • (Good) "No."

        • You must choose this option all three times to receive the "Good" result. After Crest's third stop, she'll reward you with her own DOG TREATS.

        • Go back to Bernard to return his CAMERA and punish him for his creepiness!

        • Defeat Bernard in battle using Pom's attacks. Shibe's moves are entirely useless

  6. Return to Starpugs Coffee. Talk to Ug to purchase a drink with your DOG TREATS.

    • Select the ROOT BEER FLOAT to purchase it and gain access to the cafe.

  7. After the comedy show, walk to the right side of the room and talk to Malty.

    • She'll tell you that the only way to get wi-fi in doggy heaven is to overthrow Dog.

  8. Exit the building and go across the right rainbow bridge to reach the golden gates.

Overthrow Dog

  1. Talk to Corg, the corgi standing in front of the gates.

    • Pom will offer to find Corg's lost keys to Dog's throne.

    • Corg also mentions that he thinks he threw the keys away. There's one doge you know who has access to a lot of trash!

    • After your conversation with Corg, Shibe will leave your party.

  2. Walk left until you return once again to the two houses. Enter the purple house at the bottom.

  3. Go up the stairs and examine the giant pile of trash to find the CORG-KEYS.

    • If you bought the ROOT BEER FLOAT from Starpugs, Pom will give York the drink in exchange for the keys.

    • Otherwise, if you purchased any other drink, you will have to defeat York in battle to take the keys.

  4. Return to the golden gates and interact with either the gates or Corg to use the CORG-KEYS.

    • Hus and Shibe will attack you as soon as you open the gate. You'll have to defeat them both in battle to progress.

  5. After they're knocked out, walk upwards until you reach Dave Pointer. This is your last chance to save the game before you reach the end!

  6. Continue up to enter Dog's throne room. Talk to Dog to battle him.

    • Simply attack with Incinerate as often as you can to defeat Dog.

The End

  1. Once the battle with Dog is over, Shibe will approach you. You'll have to face him one last time!

    • This is your final moral choice! If you've made any "Bad" decisions, your only option is to kill Shibe and receive the bad ending.

    • However, if you made all "Good" decisions up to this point, you will have a new option not to attack Shibe. Simply stand still during each break in the conversation.

    • There are two "Good" moral choices required to make the second option available.

      • The first is returning the FAMICOM to Goldie before using it on the stone block.

      • The second is refusing to take pictures of Crest for Bernard.

    • If you've done all that and you don't attack Shibe during the final battle, you will receive the good ending. Congratulations!

3 Comments

Pom Gets Wi-Fi Walkthrough

General Information

  • To begin playing, first open the "Pom Gets Wi-Fi" file (make sure you have the most recent version, currently v1-03). Double-click the RPG_RT application - the one with the sword icon - to start the game.

  • To switch between Fullscreen or Windowed mode, press the [F4] key or simultaneously push [Alt] + [Enter].

  • Move your character around the screen using the [W,A,S,D] or [arrow] keys.

    • When Shibe is in your party, he will automatically follow behind you. You cannot move through him or through other dogs.

  • Press [Z] or [spacebar] to interact with objects or characters and to skip through text or confirm dialogue options.

    • If you interact with Shibe, he sometimes offers you a hint about your current objective.

  • While in battle, use the Up or Down [arrow] keys to select an attack, then press [Z] or [spacebar] to confirm.

    • Your "Taunt" ability is the strongest the first time you attack with it and becomes gradually weaker with each use. Activate it twice or three times at most at the start of the battle, then switch to your other attack.

    • Finish off your enemy with "Tell a yo momma joke" which is a steady attack that always deals 10 damage to the enemy.

  • Be sure to save often! Talk to Dave Pointer, select a Save File slot (there are a maximum of 15 slots), then press [spacebar] or [Z] to save.

    • Saving over an occupied Save File slot will overwrite the previous save.

Pom's Home

  1. Press the [Z] key or [spacebar] to view any three of the four websites: Facewoof, Reddig, gTail, and Tumfur.

  2. Once you're permanently done surfing the internet, you will be automatically transported to the next area.

Find Someone Who Knows About Wi-Fi

  1. Walk right to find Shibe. After your conversation, the battle will begin automatically.

    • Attack Shibe with the "Taunt" and "Tell a yo momma joke" abilities. He won't return fire, so you can just keep attacking him until he's out of health.

    • When the battle is over Shibe will join your party.

  2. Continue right until you reach the cloud with two houses on it. Enter the lower purple house through the front door.

  3. Go up the stairs and talk to York.

    • York will tell you that the cafe to the east has Wi-Fi.

    • If you talk to him a second time, he'll also mention that Grandpa once bought him a Root Beer Float.

  4. Exit the building and go across the rainbow bridge to the right.

    • On this cloud you'll find Dave Pointer. You can talk to him at any time to save your game.

  5. Move right to reach the Park. A line of dogs is blocking your path!

Sneak into the Park

  1. Go to the line of dogs in front of the Park entrance. Looks like Sherman won't let you pass!

  2. Talk to Labra or Alma to receive a STACK OF BOOKS.

  3. Walk to the middle of the fence, then examine the stone block.

    • If you've spoken with every dog in line, you can place the STACK OF BOOKS on top of the block to make it taller.

    • It's still not tall enough though, you'll have to find more things to put on the rock.

  4. Talk to Goldie at the front of the line to ask for something to borrow.

    • Goldie will request that you fetch her some dog treats from Papi.

  5. Move left across two rainbow bridges to return to the two houses. Enter the pink house at the top.

    • As soon as you go through the door, Crest will beg you to save her from the spider.

    • Walk to the moving black speck and interact with it to smush the spider. Puddle will then enter the room and reward you with an INFLATABLE DOLPHIN.

  6. Go back outside and walk across the rainbow bridge to the left.

  7. Speak with Papi to ask for Goldie's dog treats.

    • She doesn't have the treats, but you will receive a FAMICOM.

  8. Go all the way right to return to the Park.

    • You now have to make a choice between two options:

      • (Bad) Keep the FAMICOM for yourself and place it on top of the stone block (along with the INFLATABLE DOLPHIN) or...

      • (Good) Return the FAMICOM to Goldie, the golden retriever at the front of the line.

        • If you choose the "Good" option, Goldie will reward you by allowing you to keep the FAMICOM, which you can then stack on top of the stone block.

  9. Interact with the stack of objects on top of the block to enter the park.

Fix the Frisbee Machine

  1. Run past the dangerous line of frisbees to make it to the end of the park safely.

    • The frisbees pause momentarily when they reach the right wall, you can watch them on that side to learn the pattern of their movement.

    • Move along the left wall to give yourself as much time as possible to dodge the frisbees.

  2. Hus will approach you when you reach the end of the park. After a brief converastion, he'll join your party.

  3. Enter the small hole by the upper left corner of the fence to go inside the frisbee machine room

  4. Interact with the ball of dust blocking the right path to remove it.

  5. Continue right to examine the wall of hardened dust.

    • It's too tight for Pom to get through! You'll have to find someone else who can reach the control panel.

  6. Walk left and go down through the gap in the wall to go back outside.

  7. Make your way back to the front of the park, you'll have to dodge the frisbees again.

    • You can use Hus to block the frisbees by positioning yourself to his left.

    • Alternatively, if you're feeling lazy you can get hit by a frisbee and you'll be autoamtically returned to the bottom of the park again.

  8. Exit through the front gate and walk to the dog at the end of the line.

    • Talk to Chi to ask him to join your party.

  9. Re-enter the park and make it past the flying frisbees one more time.

  10. Once you've made it to the back safely, interact with the entrance to the frisbee machine room to send Chi inside.

    • Chi will repair the frisbee machine, allowing you to safely return to the park entrance.

  11. Now that the line is gone, you can cross the right bridge to reach the Cafe!

Get Access to the Cafe - Paying customers only!

  1. Cross the rainbow bridge to reach the Starpugs Coffee cloud. Enter the cafe through the door at the right side of the building.

  2. Talk to Ug at the counter to ask for access to the cafe's wi-fi.

    • Pug will demand you buy something using dog treats... but you're broke! Go out the door to return outside.

  3. A new dog has appeared in front of the cafe. Interact with Bernard to speak to him.

    • Bernard will give you a CAMERA and ask you to stealthily take pictures of Crest (creepy!)

  4. Walk left until you reach the two houses to find Crest. Follow her as she hands out cookies to the dogs around heaven.

  5. Crest will make three stops: the first is at Papi, the second is at Dave Pointer, and the third is in front of the dog park.

    • At each stop you'll be given another moral choice, "Take some pictures?"

      • (Bad) "Yes."

        • If you choose this option even once out of the three times, you will receive the "Bad" result. Go to Bernard to deliver the photos in exchange for some DOG TREATS.

      • (Good) "No."

        • You must choose this option all three times to receive the "Good" result. After Crest's third stop, she'll reward you with her own DOG TREATS.

        • Go back to Bernard to return his CAMERA and punish him for his creepiness!

        • Defeat Bernard in battle using Pom's attacks. Shibe's moves are entirely useless

  6. Return to Starpugs Coffee. Talk to Ug to purchase a drink with your DOG TREATS.

    • Select the ROOT BEER FLOAT to purchase it and gain access to the cafe.

  7. After the comedy show, walk to the right side of the room and talk to Malty.

    • She'll tell you that the only way to get wi-fi in doggy heaven is to overthrow Dog.

  8. Exit the building and go across the right rainbow bridge to reach the golden gates.

Overthrow Dog

  1. Talk to Corg, the corgi standing in front of the gates.

    • Pom will offer to find Corg's lost keys to Dog's throne.

    • Corg also mentions that he thinks he threw the keys away. There's one doge you know who has access to a lot of trash!

    • After your conversation with Corg, Shibe will leave your party.

  2. Walk left until you return once again to the two houses. Enter the purple house at the bottom.

  3. Go up the stairs and examine the giant pile of trash to find the CORG-KEYS.

    • If you bought the ROOT BEER FLOAT from Starpugs, Pom will give York the drink in exchange for the keys.

    • Otherwise, if you purchased any other drink, you will have to defeat York in battle to take the keys.

  4. Return to the golden gates and interact with either the gates or Corg to use the CORG-KEYS.

    • Hus and Shibe will attack you as soon as you open the gate. You'll have to defeat them both in battle to progress.

  5. After they're knocked out, walk upwards until you reach Dave Pointer. This is your last chance to save the game before you reach the end!

  6. Continue up to enter Dog's throne room. Talk to Dog to battle him.

    • Simply attack with Incinerate as often as you can to defeat Dog.

The End

  1. Once the battle with Dog is over, Shibe will approach you. You'll have to face him one last time!

    • This is your final moral choice! If you've made any "Bad" decisions, your only option is to kill Shibe and receive the bad ending.

    • However, if you made all "Good" decisions up to this point, you will have a new option not to attack Shibe. Simply stand still during each break in the conversation.

    • There are two "Good" moral choices required to make the second option available.

      • The first is returning the FAMICOM to Goldie before using it on the stone block.

      • The second is refusing to take pictures of Crest for Bernard.

    • If you've done all that and you don't attack Shibe during the final battle, you will receive the good ending. Congratulations!

I played this because it reminded me of Missile the Pomeranian from Ghost Trick.

I didn't quite enjoy it. The combat sequences were too long considering you didn't really have any options.

There wasn't a whole lot of exploration to do, and Pom's commentary seems like it'd only be particularly funny if you're the sort of person who likes mocking others on the internet.

I feel like this could have been much better with more interesting characters and more things to see and do, or if it were just streamlined to eliminate the uninteresting combat sequences.

Oh my gosh, the Funyarinpa.
I never thought I'd see it outside of 999. XD
Thank you for making me almost fall out of my chair laughing, developer.

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