It's a story as old as "X-Mas" itself. Once the Twelve Days are over, all the unwanted gifts are forced out of Santa's workshop and into bargain bins world-wide. However even they have met a brighter fate than the merchandise which is the topic of tonight's top story. For these remaindered gifts are trapped in plastic balls, confined within a clear plastic cage. But thanks to the fine folk at the Real Art Design Group, people around the world have a chance to mechanically assist in freeing these brave commerce spheres. It will truly be an inspiration to our ratings.
Senior JiGNews 5 Claw Machine Correspondent Chiktionary is on site and in line, awaiting her turn. Chiktionary, what is the atmosphere like out there?
"Hi Tricky, Yes and Good Evening! Chiktionary here reporting live from the Real Art Design Group site of The Santa Claw.
The atmosphere here is electric and the excitement almost palpable. I've been here waiting in line with close to 500 other people and it's now just a little under 3 hours until I take my chance on The Santa Claw. We're watching live as each competitor takes their turn hoping to take home something special, and in just the last few minutes we've seen some awesome prize-winning happening. A large pink ball has been won by one lucky player. And believe it or not, a large blue ball has gone to another lucky contender! There are no losers here tonight Tricky, I can tell you! It's a great carnival atmosphere, and around me people are represented by a multitude of avatars, including pickles, baubles, cacti and penguins.
So Viewers, if you live anywhere in the general vicinity of The Internet, you too can come on down, any time, and take a chance on the Claw. You never know what you might win, even if it means losing your dignity in the process. I'll be back very soon with another update."
Thank You, C. For those of you now turning in, we're discussing The Santa Claw, a claw crane machine played for free online. Let me tell you, the day you're not thrilled to manipulate a mechanical claw over the internet is the day that you're not thrilled with life... Wait, it seems that we have a development down at the scene. Chiktionary, Tell us what's happening.
"Yes, this is exciting stuff! Just moments ago a man in a floppy, yes that's right, floppy, hat entered the booth and is adding more prizes to the already enormous pile! And as we speak he has just generously placed a prize in the claw for some lucky player! It's all happening here at The Santa Claw!
Otherwise, Tricky, it looks like the thrill is getting to most people here, their eyes are glazed over with anticipation, and speech seems to be lost to most.Next update will be a live commentary while your loyal JiGNews representative takes her turn at The Santa Claw"
All right C., I'm contractually obligated to say that I'll be waiting with bated breath. As for you at home, stay tuned to JiGNews 5 for all up to the minute coverage.
"Well Tricky, it's been 7 corn-dogs and a giant cola slurped since my last update and I can now see the giant Santa Claw booth from where I'm standing, and it's immense, to say the least. The whole area has been cordoned off with thick red ribbons, as I make my way into the booth.
Okay in front of me I have controls looking suspiciously like [arrow] keys, so I can move the claw up, down, left and right. There's also a button marked Grab. I've got two views, one from inside the claw looking down into the booth, which will help me aim for something in particular. The other view is from the side looking into the massive pile of gifts just waiting to be won. Oh Schnitzel! I've only got about a minute to do this!
Now I'm scoping the prizes using my arrow keys, and I can see it! I want that skateboard! Okay I'm directly over it now, so using my mouse I click the Grab button, a siren is sounding... The claw is now moving down to the skateboard... c'mon...c'mon...c'mon... it's now lifting back up, the skateboard appears to be in the grip of the claw... OH NOOO!!! SO CLOSE!!!!
Sorry Folks, no skateboard for the JiGNews team tonight. Let's hope it finds a home very soon. But I have to say it's been worth the wait. Playing an online claw game live has been an amazing experience and one I'll never forget. Back to you to wrap it up Tricky. I'm heading to the end of the line..."
Well, it may require registration, the line may be long, and the chances of victory are the same as its real life counterpart, but The Santa Claw is not to be missed. The developers have confirmed that it shall be up indefinitely, and while there have been issues with the observation cams, the actual gameplay cams are solid. So from all of us at JiGNews 5: Good night world, and play nice!