Skywire Tours Closed due to Safety Concerns
Skywire Tours is a unique cross between a cable car ride and a roller coaster, which takes riders from place to place and allows them to see the sights in a new way. Anyone who hasn't ridden the Skywire knows someone who has, or knows someone who knows someone who has.
The safety of the ride was first called into question when marine biologist Oliver Aquanaut (age 21) and his wife, Emily (age 19) threatened to sue Skywire Tours after Emily was tossed out of the car during one eventful ride.
"I was sitting in the car, enjoying the sights," Mrs. Aquanaut told the media. "The next thing I knew, I was free-falling. Then I was in the water ... I never took swimming lessons. I would've been a goner if that fisherman hadn't pulled me out!"
Her husband added that although Skywire Tours is advertised as "a thrilling experience you'll never forget ... [that slogan] can be taken two ways. We're never getting on that thing ever again!"
The Aquanauts' misfortune is far from unique. An investigation revealed that over five hundred customers to date have been tossed from Skywire cars due to collisions. In fact, this is not the only safety hazard officials are concerned with: the cars often go underwater without proper water protection, forcing the passengers to hold their breaths. Also, the rails are often very brittle, and have a tendency to fall off during rides, often taking the car with them.
"We can't believe this one slipped by us," safety inspector Donald Dangull (age 33) explained. "Mr. Trommey has a lot of explaining to do."
Nye Trommey refused to comment other than to say that he "will personally look into" the safety issue.
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