Bah humbug! What sort of present do you give when you're happily married to your Ph.D in the digestive function of sub-Saharan dungbeetles? "Here my little darling, I bought you a new statistics package!" Here are some other ideas for what to do on a day like today...
- Heart Pounder - Similar to Bloons, this is a great game for people who have just been dumped. You have a limited amount of shots to clear the required amount of little smiley hearts from the screen. It looks adorable, but it's fiendishly difficult. Hearts make a really satisfying smashing sound when they break.
- Muck About with Cupid & Fate - A surprisingly good advergame designed for Match.com which is aimed at guys. It's based on Arkanoid, with a couple of twists - you're bouncing Cupid on your cloud, and you have to avoid soppy stuff like flowers, hearts and candy. The bricks you break are things like burgers, chips and consoles. As you level up, unbreakable male and female symbols appear among the burgers, and once you've broken all the bricks you need to aim your guy into a vortex in the middle of the screen. It's difficult, and I need to warn you guys that if you are NOT getting your girl flowers and candy, you had better come up with something engrossing for her console.
- Make Your Own Romance - Does entering completely inappropriate words into a build-your-own-story game ever get old? I don't think it turnip.
- Restaurant Romance - Odd little point-and-click where you're the maitre'd and you're trying to win a beautiful woman away from her lunkhead date. Resort to all sorts of unethical behaviour to show her she'd be way better off with you. JayIsGames does not endorse putting laxatives in your romantic rivals' dinner.
- Valentiner - Nifty little heart-themed version of Gold Miner. As the angel (boy or girl, your choice) swings their arrow, shoot golden hearts and reel them in to win points. You need to reach a certain target to get to the next level. If you get one of the stony hearts, it will take ages to reel in and only give 1 or 2 points, losing you valuable time. You can also pick up bags of gold and gift boxes, and buy powerups.
- Valentine's: Search for Love - No, not a dating sim - an incredibly frustrating and challenging game where you need to find hearts that have been displaced within an image. Much, much harder than it sounds, especially when the image is of a blue sky with a few clouds.
- Meet My Valentine - In this special Valentines Day edition of Difference Games' spot-the-difference series, our sweethearts encounter canine interference on the road to happiness. KAWAIIII!!!
- Queen of Hearts Quest - Simple shooter - don't let any of the hearts get past you or the game is over. You can only move up and down, spacebar to shoot.
- Sudoku Hearts - Arrange the hearts in a 3x3x3 grid, ensuring that the same colour isn't repeated in any row, column or square.