Link Dump Friday №164
The internet is a vast and disorienting wasteland full of trolls, n00bs, and memes that have never been funny. That's why, here at Jay is Games, it means a lot to us that you make the journey to visit. We will forever endeavour to provide you with the finest games the web has to offer and never insult your intelligence or betray you. Because you're special.
- Munekyun - Remember Kissma? From the same creators of that particular brand of brain melting nonsense comes a game about trying to touch fingertips with a woman in a bookstore who would really rather you did not. Unfortunately, it's another simple, frantic-clicking excuse to showcase ridiculous and entertaining power ups, and developers Party Tencho don't get any points for that anymore. While the action is weirdly hypnotic, I would like to see the developers apply themselves to a game that wasn't basically "Kissma, but with slightly different graphics."
- Secret Dancer - Although I find the concept of a shadowy little ballerina with ghostly laughter wanting you to follow her in a dark building late at night to be frankly freaky, apparently our good neighbours across the pond are used to this sort of thing. A security guard in London's Tate Modern Art gallery is alone one night when Edgar Degas's famous, creepy sculpture comes to life in this point-and-click game, and heartwarming messages aimed at young girls ensue. You'll spend more time actually watching video clips than you do playing, but if you're looking for something lighter and different, this may be your cuppa. Pip, pip, wot wot? Stereotypes, etc.
- Secret Exit - While some of my fine fellow feathered reviewers were reminded of certain other games, for me it was a disappointingly bland presentation that landed this otherwise serviceable little puzzle/platformer here rather than within its own article. Use the clues to figure out how to get the apparently shy exit to appear in each of the thirty levels. I mean, I don't know why. Your little yellow protagonist doesn't look any happier if you do. But that's fine. I'm used to ingratitude. After all, I'm here every week, aren't I? (I'M JUST KIDDING OHGODDON'TLEAVEME!)
- Async Racing - Similar to Hell is Other People, your opponents in this racing game are not cold, unfeeling processors, but the recordings of other players (like you!) who have played that track before. So while you could do your very best and blast flawlessly through the track in a performance that will make all future comers weep and curse your name, I find it much more rewarding to be a distraction by pinwheeling in no particular direction across the screen like a drunken ballerina. Yet another example of why you never ever want to play any sort of multiplayer with me.
- Halo Flower - It's been a while since we last checked in with Minoto, whose brain is like some wondrous, strange fairyland. This is another point-and-click game full of that signature silliness, featuring a sleeping elephant, a devil of some sort under glass, and a bunny with a remote control. The logic at work here does not resemble our Earth logic, which forces an "everything-and-the-kitchen-sink" approach to problem solving. But it's fun, cute, and will broaden your imagination in weird and interesting ways, like fertilizing a bonsai tree with nothing but pixie dust and ground up Hunter S Thompson memoirs.
Tane - [BONUS WEIRDNESS!] You know what? I don't even know. Less a game and more of an interactive, um, art... thing... where you try to find and click the next link, which is... Tane. If you reach the end you'll get a screen that provides a bit of explanation, but in some ways, this is more enjoyable if you pretend the collective insanity of the internet caused this to be spontaneously birthed from some strange shared consciousness of weirdoes. Bonus points if you recognise all-around rad dude KC Green's art within.