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Host Master and the Conquest of Humor


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Rating: 4.7/5 (214 votes)
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PsychotronicHost MasterHost Master and the Conquest of Humor is a retro point-and-click adventure game in the style of early LucasArts adventures, brought to us by Double Fine, the gently twisted studio responsible for Tasha's Game. And when I say "in the style of", I mean "constantly making jokes about". Even the very first screen is a reference to the days of DOS, and the user interface is a deliberately clunky riff on classic adventure game awkwardness. In fact, the whole game is a tribute to Double Fine president Tim Schafer, who helped set the standard for game humor in 1990 with The Secret of Monkey Island, and kept the streak going over the years with cult favorites Day of the Tentacle, Grim Fandango, and Psychonauts.

You take the role of Schafer, backstage at the 2009 Game Developers Conference, completely unprepared to host the event. (In the real world, the real Tim Schafer is in fact hosting at this year's GDC. Host Master and the Conquest of Humor has so many layers of self-reference, it threatens to collapse in on itself, taking the whole conference and possibly the universe with it.) Your goal is to scour the area, collecting as many jokes as possible before you finally walk on stage. The more jokes you find, the better the evening goes.

Control your character with the mouse. A list of possible actions, more than you'd think you'd need, rests in the lower left-hand corner of the screen. Click on one of those, and then on an object in the scene, in order to get something done. It's definitely an awkward system compared with modern adventure games such as The Several Journeys of Reemus or Emerald City Confidential, but this game is paying homage to the classics, and besides, it gives you plenty of room to experiment and find hilarious easter eggs.

There are a surprising number of jokes squirreled away in every nook and cranny of the greenroom. On my first play-through, I thought I was doing pretty well with 5 jokes, but it turns out you can find more than four times that number. As with Tim Schafer's own games though, the true reward is in the countless humorous asides in the dialogue, earned whenever you interact with practically anything. It's all very sharp and clever, tying the history of games to the present day with a deft hand.

If you have even the slightest nostalgia for early graphic adventure games, Host Master and the Conquest of Humor is made for you.

Play Host Master and the Conquest of Humor

Thanks for sending this one in, Jakkar and Alex!

Walkthrough Guide


(Please allow page to fully load for spoiler tags to be functional.)

Here's a little walkthrough hope it helps.

  1. Look at the magazines to your left, you should get a key.

  2. Pick up the newspaper that is lying on the floor to the right of Tim. Go ahead and look at it once you have it in your inventory. There's a half joke and a text solicitation neither of which we can do much with now.

  3. Pick up picture of Tim mounted on the wall to the right of the red curtain. Not much we can do with the wall safe right now but on the back of the picture there is a ripped note. Go ahead, pick it up, and look at it. Another half joke, but since it doesn't match the first half we picked up, let's move on.

  4. Open the cigar box then look at it, you'll get a pair of tiny scissors.

  5. Now look at the cigar box again. Use the strange key you got out of the magazines earlier on the cigar box and look inside one more time to get the empty book of matches. There are two totally separate hints here, but we'll come back to both of them in a little bit.

  6. Push the barstool. After you have proven your dominance pick up the yellow piece of paper.

  7. If you look at the yellow note, you'll see it matches one of the half jokes we already picked up. Use the yellow note on the newspaper to get your first joke.

  8. Pick up the bear rug. You'll only fold over one of the bear's paws revealing a mobile phone device. Pick it up.

  9. If you look at your newspaper, right under the joke it says, "Text joke to 032084". So, use the mobile phone device and click on the TXT icon. In the to box enter in the number 032084. Click on the TXT box and key in JOKE. Now click on the send icon. You'll get a couple of prompts you'll need to click okay on before getting your second joke.

  10. Remember that book of matches? Look at it again. At top is a series of numbers, and at the bottom there is a diagram of something. In truth, the diagram is a bear head meaning this book of matches is upside. So the number at top is really 186891. This is the combination to the wall safe so look at the wall safe to bring up the key pad and punch in this number.

  11. Pick up the old book and odd remote. Look at the book once in your inventory (bathroom reader) to get a whopping five jokes bringing us to seven!

  12. Back to the matchbook, if you look at the bottom diagram upside, it shows an x over the bear's left eye. This requires a little bit of pixel hunting but what we need to do is push the eye of the bear. When you find and push the hotspot, the bear will vomit something. Pick it up, There's not much we can do with this right now.

  13. Open the big red curtains.

  14. Pick up the sugary cereal (yellow box on the left atop the shelf behind the curtain).

  15. Open sugary cereal.

  16. Use the cigar cutters on the cereal prize. Open the cereal prize (cheap trinket thing now). Now you can look at it to get our eighth joke.

  17. Now look at the Italian dinner jacket hanging up (the one furthest to the right). You'll get a joke card. Look at the card to get our ninth joke.

  18. Open the mini fridge. On the door is a blue note, pick it up. Use this with the other blue torn note in our inventory to combine them and make up the tenth joke.

  19. Now look towards the top of the open mini fridge. You're looking specifically for the frozen box hot spot. Look at it to get the box of popsicles. Open the box to get a mushroom flavored popsicle (ew) and use that popsicle on Tim. Look at the popsicle stick to get your eleventh joke.

  20. Use the cigar cutters to cut the table cloth that hangs over the table (might take you a couple of tries). Pick up both the shredded table cloth and the scrap of card (the scrap of card is the first part of the final half joke set we have to find in the game).

  21. Turn on the strange remote we got from the safe earlier revealing the executive bathroom.

  22. Open the mirror and pick up the shred of card. Combine this shred of card with the one we got from under the table to make our twelfth joke.

  23. Now use the shredded cloth with the sink and then turn on the sink (note: you MUST use the turn on command as opposed to the use command for the sink. If you try to use the sink, Tim will talk about how he refuses to wash his hands). If you did it right, the sink will start to overflow.

  24. Use the executive bathroom remote and a strange new compartment will be made available. There's only one thing that can be picked up here, an odd thing that is lying on a pedestal. Go ahead and pick up the odd thing.

  25. Use the strange artifact we got from the bear's mouth with the odd artifact we got from the new compartment behind the curtain.

  26. Turn off the light switch next to the door. The rubber chicken you just made will start flashing. Look at it. Click on the flashing eye to get an ancient scroll.

  27. Open the scroll then look at it to get ten more jokes completing all 22 jokes that can be found.

  28. Go ahead and open the door, and when asked if you want to leave the room with 22 jokes, say yes.

67 Comments

joemomma March 24, 2009 6:47 PM

Am I missing it, or is there no save feature?

Reply

I have 5 jokes and 2 half jokes and I'm stuck.

And, no, I don't think there's a save feature.

Reply

ok, i have two jokes unfinished. and i have 9 jokes total (not counting the unfinished ones). the ones i need to have done are

the sticky note and the index card. i already have the blue note, popcicle stick (spelling?), the prize from the box, and the 5 from the book

am i missing any other ones?

Reply

This is a nice enough game, but the fact that there are 12 buttons or so makes it much different than other point and click games! They make it harder, but more fun!

Reply

No, there is no save feature.

Here's where I've gotten so far. In bite sized chunks because it's a mess all in one go.

1.

pick up newspaper look at it, pick up the bear rug and pick up the phone, text the number on the newspaper with "JOKE" (really not worth the money but hey it's one more joke)

2.

push over the barstool, use the sticky note underneath with the newspaper to get another joke

3.

Open cigar box and get cigar cutters get key from magazines, use key on cigar box. There will be a matchbox inside, read the matchbox upside-down. pick up the picture of tim, and use the combination on the safe. Five jokes inside the old book and pick up the remote while you're there.

4.

Get the note from the back of the picture, use the cigar cutters on the table cloth, get the cloth and the revealed note.

5.

Open the curtains and get the sugary box of cereal, look at the last jacket on the right for a note you can combine with a previous one. open the fridge and check the ice box for a popcicle, use the popcicle on yourself then look at the stick for a joke. open the cereal and look inside for a prize, use the cutters on the prize and open the result for a joke.

6.

Use the remote you got in the safe, open the mirror and grab the note, combine it with the previously acquired note. turn on the sink and put the cloth in the sink. It will flood, use the remote, it will jam and move to a room where you will find an odd artifact.

No clue what to do from there though.

Reply
sono_ryuu_sochi March 24, 2009 7:06 PM

It took me forever but I finally did it. I had to use another thread for a clue for the last ten but considering that the last ten are kind of cheap(maybe not, I'm not used to these games), I'm pretty proud of myself.

Reply

Unskippable text? I'm not playing any further.

Reply

I'm at 11. Er, 11 1/2.

5 from the book, so that's cheating a little...

newspaper + sticky note from behind picture

joke from mobile phone (text the number from the newspaper)

popsicle stick

note from under the stool + note from behind the tablecloth

Obviously forgetting a couple of others.

I'm trying to figure out what to do with the

odd artifact.

Reply
coolpilot March 24, 2009 7:23 PM

I've found 12 out of the 22 jokes, and now I'm stuck. I've used almost everything in the room. Anyone know the others?

Reply

Augh! Is there any way to turn off the horrible music?!

Reply

Got 10 jokes and 2 half jokes here. Left with the ripped paper (blue) and the scrap of index paper

Reply
Fhánaí March 24, 2009 7:38 PM

LOL, try going out the door with no jokes at all - definitely my favorite ending.

Also, thumbs up for the in-game Psychonauts reference. :D

Reply

Stuck with 12 jokes... It's hard to believe there are actually 22 jokes there!

The lower clue in the match box had me puzzled for a while... I should have noticed it as I checked the safe code.

Reply
sono_ryuu_sochi March 24, 2009 7:42 PM

When I was playing, I sometimes didn't know what to do. It was so unbearable. Eventually I poked and prodded enough to figure out the ending. I'm just glad that I wasn't the butt of any jokes.

Reply
frigginacky March 24, 2009 8:07 PM

I was just about to post that I was stuck at 12 as well, but then I found the last 10. Hint:

Try turning out the lights.

Something in your inventory should catch your attention.

Reply
coolpilot March 24, 2009 8:12 PM

Finnaly got all 22. Once you get to 12, you only have one thing left to do. Love the 0 joke ending.

What to do after getting 12 jokes:

Pick up the remains of the cut up table cloth and place it in the sink. Use the device and it will show a podium with something on it. Pick the thing up. Then, go to the bear and poke the bear's eye. It takes a steady mouse to get it. The other piece of the artifact will come out of its mouth. Pick it up. Use one piece on the other piece. You get a rubber chicken. Turn out the lights. Look at the chicken, then press its glowing eye. A scroll will come out of its end. Open the scroll, then look at it. You will recieve the final 10 jokes. Go out the door, and recive moonwalk mode!

There are several endings. I've noted the following: 0 jokes, only a few jokes, several jokes (around 12), many jokes (aroun 18-21), and all 22. I might make a walkthrough later.

Reply

Argh! I also have 12 out of the 22... here are my ideas for where other jokes might have to do with:

1. The 'odd artifact.' It needs a head, perhaps?

2. The light switch. I feel like something should be revealed in the dark.

3. Only other completely unused objects are the appetizers, the bottles and the urinals.

That's all I've got, anybody have other ideas?

Reply

Thanks coolpilot! Turns out I had all the ingredients/ideas but didn't put it together.

Reply

Finally got it !

To get the 10 final jokes :

Look at the empty match box... a bear ..an eye crossed...The bear rug!

Push the eye, and get the second piece of the chicken.

Put both of them together

Turn off the light, look at the chicken and click its sparkling eye.

Open the scroll and that's it !! :)

Reply

I put the part of the tablecloth in the sink and it just disappeared, I've pressed the button but the secret compartment doesn't open for me.

What's up?

Reply

I'm only missing the first part of the "walks into a bar" joke. Any clues, plase?

Reply

@Shivan:

Did you turn on the sink?

Reply

That was an enjoyable game... the unlockable was a fun addition too.

Reply
Anonymous March 24, 2009 10:13 PM

Drat, I have 21, and am just missing the other half of the index card. Surely I've missed something simple?

Reply

@JIGuest:

Try behind the mirror. It took me ages, too.

Reply
Anonymous March 25, 2009 12:35 AM

JiGuest
for the other half of the index card

'open' the mirror in the bathroom. i had to look that one up.

Reply
bigbadthor March 25, 2009 2:49 AM

LOL! Moonwalk mode unlocked. Rad!

Reply
Cheeetar March 25, 2009 2:57 AM

Where do I find the first part of the 'walks into a bar' joke?

Reply

Here's a little walkthrough hope it helps.

  1. Look at the magazines to your left, you should get a key.

  2. Pick up the newspaper that is lying on the floor to the right of Tim. Go ahead and look at it once you have it in your inventory. There's a half joke and a text solicitation neither of which we can do much with now.

  3. Pick up picture of Tim mounted on the wall to the right of the red curtain. Not much we can do with the wall safe right now but on the back of the picture there is a ripped note. Go ahead, pick it up, and look at it. Another half joke, but since it doesn't match the first half we picked up, let's move on.

  4. Open the cigar box then look at it, you'll get a pair of tiny scissors.

  5. Now look at the cigar box again. Use the strange key you got out of the magazines earlier on the cigar box and look inside one more time to get the empty book of matches. There are two totally separate hints here, but we'll come back to both of them in a little bit.

  6. Push the barstool. After you have proven your dominance pick up the yellow piece of paper.

  7. If you look at the yellow note, you'll see it matches one of the half jokes we already picked up. Use the yellow note on the newspaper to get your first joke.

  8. Pick up the bear rug. You'll only fold over one of the bear's paws revealing a mobile phone device. Pick it up.

  9. If you look at your newspaper, right under the joke it says, "Text joke to 032084". So, use the mobile phone device and click on the TXT icon. In the to box enter in the number 032084. Click on the TXT box and key in JOKE. Now click on the send icon. You'll get a couple of prompts you'll need to click okay on before getting your second joke.

  10. Remember that book of matches? Look at it again. At top is a series of numbers, and at the bottom there is a diagram of something. In truth, the diagram is a bear head meaning this book of matches is upside. So the number at top is really 186891. This is the combination to the wall safe so look at the wall safe to bring up the key pad and punch in this number.

  11. Pick up the old book and odd remote. Look at the book once in your inventory (bathroom reader) to get a whopping five jokes bringing us to seven!

  12. Back to the matchbook, if you look at the bottom diagram upside, it shows an x over the bear's left eye. This requires a little bit of pixel hunting but what we need to do is push the eye of the bear. When you find and push the hotspot, the bear will vomit something. Pick it up, There's not much we can do with this right now.

  13. Open the big red curtains.

  14. Pick up the sugary cereal (yellow box on the left atop the shelf behind the curtain).

  15. Open sugary cereal.

  16. Use the cigar cutters on the cereal prize. Open the cereal prize (cheap trinket thing now). Now you can look at it to get our eighth joke.

  17. Now look at the Italian dinner jacket hanging up (the one furthest to the right). You'll get a joke card. Look at the card to get our ninth joke.

  18. Open the mini fridge. On the door is a blue note, pick it up. Use this with the other blue torn note in our inventory to combine them and make up the tenth joke.

  19. Now look towards the top of the open mini fridge. You're looking specifically for the frozen box hot spot. Look at it to get the box of popsicles. Open the box to get a mushroom flavored popsicle (ew) and use that popsicle on Tim. Look at the popsicle stick to get your eleventh joke.

  20. Use the cigar cutters to cut the table cloth that hangs over the table (might take you a couple of tries). Pick up both the shredded table cloth and the scrap of card (the scrap of card is the first part of the final half joke set we have to find in the game).

  21. Turn on the strange remote we got from the safe earlier revealing the executive bathroom.

  22. Open the mirror and pick up the shred of card. Combine this shred of card with the one we got from under the table to make our twelfth joke.

  23. Now use the shredded cloth with the sink and then turn on the sink (note: you MUST use the turn on command as opposed to the use command for the sink. If you try to use the sink, Tim will talk about how he refuses to wash his hands). If you did it right, the sink will start to overflow.

  24. Use the executive bathroom remote and a strange new compartment will be made available. There's only one thing that can be picked up here, an odd thing that is lying on a pedestal. Go ahead and pick up the odd thing.

  25. Use the strange artifact we got from the bear's mouth with the odd artifact we got from the new compartment behind the curtain.

  26. Turn off the light switch next to the door. The rubber chicken you just made will start flashing. Look at it. Click on the flashing eye to get an ancient scroll.

  27. Open the scroll then look at it to get ten more jokes completing all 22 jokes that can be found.

  28. Go ahead and open the door, and when asked if you want to leave the room with 22 jokes, say yes.

Reply
fuzzyface March 25, 2009 10:21 AM

I liked this game very much, and except the ancient artifact I even managed to find all the jokes myself.

I like how the game is packed with nice messages for a lot of things that are not part of the direct plot-line. Its just so much enjoyable if you get an original message other than "this does not work".

Also it shows you one thing. You *can* make a single room game, which has any more intellectual imaginativeness than the stupid/boring "you don't remeber anything, escape the room".

Reply

This game was amazing! Especially as a fan of the old Lucas Arts games. The only thing I couldn't find was the bear's eye. The hints he gives while you're farting around are just enough to help with the solutions. And of course moonwalk mode was good good fun! Kudos to the creator of this one!!

Reply

That game was a lot of fun. As confusing as all the commands are, it's intended to reward the frantic completionists who insist on using everything on everything else, just to see what would happen. (It's better than being afraid to use anything on anything else in case you die and have to start over from whenever was the last time you saved... Unless you can just go back to before you did whatever killed you. Then that's fun too)

Anyway, I finished the game with 0 jokes and 22, and now want to see how many alternate endings there are. This one-room adventure game (that isn't just about escaping from it) has replay value!

Reply
Francesco S. March 25, 2009 12:46 PM

Lol, loved the "ancient artifact" (a quotation from Zack McCracken and the Alien Mindbenders) and what Tim says when you look at it ("... but where's the pulley? Bet it comes with the sequel."), which is a cross-reference to Monkey Island's Rubber chicken with a pulley in the middle item. Genius!

Reply

Great fun mini game thanks, just completed it with the help of a couple of spoilers. Brought back some memories.

Reply
Elsmonster March 25, 2009 2:45 PM

The webpage is there, but it says 'Do you have a sound card installed? Y/N' where the game should be. I can't click yes or no either.

Reply

Elsmonster:

Press "Y".

Reply

For the "eye," the walkthrough information isn't helpful. Maybe a better hint on how to click on it. I've tried 50 times and can't click on it. Maybe a location would be helpful.

Reply

i'm about to get really mad with that bear eye thing. I know everybody tell to punch the eye but am i suppose to look at the object and then trying to find the spot ? because it takes hours, every time i miss the sceen goes and Tim always say the same sentence. arrrrrrrr please help me ^^

Reply

how do you do that with this beareye thing? you have to look at it and just try to click at his eye while you are looking at it?

Reply
Melissa300 March 25, 2009 7:50 PM

This is a really fun game. I love retro games!

Reply
Anonymous March 25, 2009 9:14 PM

By "eye of the bear" he means the bear RUG, not the matchbook.

Reply

For the bear eye:

When I wrote the walkthrough, I wrote "push" for a reason. That's the command button you have to use for it. Make sure that in the little command prompt that it says it's the eye of the bear and not just "bear". This can be frustrating because the hotspot is only about a pixel or two in size, so even if you think you have it, if you move the mouse even a little bit, you might lose the hotspot.

But yes, you must use the "push" command.

Reply

And just to make double sure, I just loaded up the game again and did the bear eye part, and yes, both the walkthrough and the following spoiler regarding it are correct.

Reply

When you beat the game:

you get the "Moonwalk Enabled" message. Tim will walk backwards if you replay the game right then!

Pretty funny.

Reply

WHY can't I use "strange artifact" with "odd thing" ?? You would think that would be an obvious combination.

Reply

This game is fun, although as I was playing I noticed a problem.

I was able to pick up the same sticky note twice. (I was able to do the action that garnered the sticky note twice).

The sticky note took the place of the key in my inventory - so the key is no longer there.

Now I must start over. sad...

Reply
bonesluce March 27, 2009 6:12 PM

i got moonwalk mode! lol

Reply

I must say, my favorite part is the moonwalk ability after you get all 22 jokes xD

Reply

I have no idea why, but whenever I open the page, it's a blank page and nothing comes up. :(
It won't work although I kept reopening the page.

Reply

Haha! Moonwalk mode! I love it!

Reply

Jacky:
I had the same problem; just disable any ad blocking software, and be sure to enable all cookies, (not just session cookies) for "www.doublefine.com".
--------------------------------

I noticed someone complaining about the music of the game and thought I'd try to type "N" at the beginning. It didn't mute the game like I thought it would, but strangely enough the music was even *louder* when the game first started.... I personally thought the music was alright, being supposedly retro and all (hey, most music in DOS and other old system games were kind of like that, you learn to tune them out as long as they weren't too grating) but this game's music did get a little annoying when the volume was turned up like that. Then again, you could always temporarily mute your computer's volume. Give this game a chance even if you've never played the games mentioned at the beginning of this article like "Grim Fandago" and such (even though you really should give some of them a try), if you like adventure games and love humor, this little game should provide some entertaining pastime for a lunch break OR a leisurely afternoon.

Reply
Dark-Angel-x08 April 17, 2009 5:58 PM

Haha Moonwalk Mode. I liked that :D
Barely had to use the walkthrough :)

Reply

Great game! I love it!

Reply

When the page finished loading, it's just blank even I disabled all those blocking tthings!

Reply
sdCorinne June 3, 2009 6:36 PM

I seriously signed up for an account just so I could say how entertained I was by this game! Maybe I'm just easily amused, but I thought it was hysterical!

Reply

This was great! Really playing a game with content as high quality as the classics. I was glad when the music stopped though.

Reply

This was very fun and funny! :D

Ironically, the jokes we collect aren't as funny :P

The moonwalker mode just made me laugh so much!.. it's just so random

Reply

Four words: FED WE FUN KNEE

Reply
Architectonic July 9, 2009 7:40 AM

Seriously enjoyed this one. So much fun, especially with the rubber chicken :)

Wouldn't have got all the jokes without help though.

Reply
Anonymous July 10, 2009 4:54 AM

After some empirical testing, here're the endings:
0: the riot
1-6: 'small handful'
7-21: 'pretty good collection'
22: royal victory

Had an obscenely good time trying the 'Turn on' and 'Turn off' actions on everything. Definitely beats 'I don't know how to do that.' Quality.

Reply

Moonwalk mode is great.

Reply

Reverie:
Pressing N at the beginning makes the in-game music sound similar to the MIDI / PC Speaker used in old adventure games. The whole "Do you have a sound card installed?" question references a time when those with a sound card had access to slightly higher quality music (if the developers added it), while those without were left with the PC Speaker.

Reply

*finished the game and twitched when she saw she only got 3/22*

Yeah... I suck. 8'D This was pretty funny though, but I wish the music looped or something. I need to replay this for sure.

The part with the bar stool cracked me up.

Reply

Is it just me, or does the game not exist anymore? That link takes you to news, and when you try to get to the name from that, it takes you to news again. Anyway I can get to it?

[Edit: It looks like the developer changed all the links on their site. I've updated the review above, the links should all function properly. -Jay]

Reply
Acidifiers May 30, 2010 9:25 PM

I played this awhile ago and remember having fun with it. I don't remember much else about it though, but I'm currently satisfied with turning everything on. Hmm. I should probably actually try to play the game now. Righto. Here I go.

Reply
Procrastinateher February 5, 2011 7:27 PM

Well, I feel a bit silly for needing a walkthrough to finish this game. But given that

I kept trying to poke the eye of the bear picture on the matchbox instead of on the bear rug

I'm pretty sure I needed the help lol.

Don't forget to try combining actions with Tim, just to get more lulz.

Reply
jennykim610 January 9, 2014 4:11 AM

Ohhh...
Awesome

Reply

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